Sunday, April 20, 2008

The Oracle has spoken

My bs-meter is usually highly sensitive to claims of the prophetic, whether biblical or astrological, read from palms, tea leaves, or yaro sticks, or discerned from Kondratyev waves. But now, and for the record, I wish to report that I've been completely convinced by the oracle at Amazon.com, which now predicts, based on my past buying habits, that I would be interested in purchasing Things to Do Now That You're Retired by Jane Garton. Well, if the oracle says that I'm retired, I must be retired.* It was a good career, however brief and however modest, and now -- without the advice of Ms. Garton, mind you -- I shall dedicate my reclining years to good living and the occasional composition of a few choice Peches de vieillesse.

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* Which reminds me of a story.... sometime in his later tenure at Harvard, Walter Piston was asked by his students about his retirement plans. He is reported to have replied, in his deepest Maine accent, "Why, I've been retired for years."

2 comments:

Herb Levy said...

Thanks for this post. It reminded that I hadn't gone back to check the "don't use for recommendations" box for the couple of things I ordered from Amazon this morning.

sfmike said...

Just like myself, you are an old man masquerading as a young and now middle-aged one and cannot WAIT for the sins of old age.