Wednesday, August 02, 2006

FAQ

Apropos of nothing, here are a few answers to actual questions culled from my inbox:

Are you the Daniel Wolf who arranged ... (something) ... for guitar?


No. At least not yet. What's it worth to you?

What's your favorite band?

Spot 1019.

Your favorite sport?

Either Croquet or Mumblety Peg. (Really: I am presently typing one-handed due to a recent meeting between a croquet mallet, a croquet corner flagpost, and my left hand.)(Really.)

Your favorite game?

Poker or Liverpool Rummy.

What your favorite line from a movie?

"Look at 'em: ordinary fucking people, I hate 'em." (10 points to everyone who can name that film.)

Why do you live in Frankfurt?

One thing led to another.

With your surname, you must be German?

No. My father was born a Hays, his father died in an auto accident, and he was adopted by his step-father, Mr. Wolf. Aside from one Dutch grandfather, the rest of the family is either Irish or a predominently Anglo-Irish mix. And as for confession, there are Catholics, Unitarians, Dutch Reformed, Mormons (briefly), Presbyterians, Anglicans, Home-churchers, Puritans, Methodists, and Freethinkers.

Where would you prefer to live?

West Cork. Morro Bay. Naxos.

What herbs go into Frankfurter Griesoß?

Sorrel, borrage, chives, pimpernel, chervil, and any two of the following: watercress, dill, lemon melissa, parsley.

If you were drinking, what would you be drinking?

Wild Turkey or Laphraoig. Talisker if you're pouring. Straight.

What music do you envy most?

At the moment: the Mozart G minor Quintet, the Javanese Gadhung Mlathi, and John Cage's Cheap Imitation.

What should every schoolboy know?

No incest, folk-dancing, or buying into gap openings. In ordinary four-voice voice leading, a complete seventh chord cannot be following by a second complete seventh chord. A map is not the territory named. Every language has the same potential to express a given content, and that business about n Eskimo words for snow is bunk. Hot wok, cold oil. Marry a wealthy woman. It's impossible to live in Germany without access to a power drill. Keep your kitchen knives sharp. Facility with bicycle repair is useful. A french horn player need never be lonely. If it's not smoking, then using a y-connector is okay.

3 comments:

PW said...

Repo Man (who is alway intense).

Anonymous said...

What's a gap opening?

Tom Hilton said...

My mama tried to tell me,
My papa told me too,
Don't let western civilization
Make a dipshit out of you.