Wednesday, August 30, 2006

This sentence is the title of another blog item at Renewable Music

This sentence plays one prelude and two-fifths of a fugue from The Well-Tempered Clavier each morning before breakfast. This sentence intends to create a distraction to keep the counterpoint teacher from discovering a pair of avoidable parallel fifths. This sentence can argue for hours about the optimal Abigaille in Nabucco, but secretly prefers to Nat King Cole to any opera singer. This sentence never managed to get into Britten, Schostakovich, or Henze, but has weak spots for Sibelius, Hovhaness, and Martin Denny. This sentence once knew a cellist who only used rosined fingers when disrobing a lover. This sentence wrote twelve-tone music in order to get a PhD but now writes tonal Broadway musicals and film scores under the pen name J. This sentence once signed in as "Mrs. Stockhausen" in a Amsterdam hotel. This sentence was written by a critic named K. who wants us to cut the crap and start talking about the piece K. wrote in 1974 in which K. invented the triplet. This sentence is angry because it was told that it would have to pay for a full-page ad in Fanfare if it wanted to end with a guaranteed ! This sentence used to play horn with the Xville Philharmonic, but lost the job after biting too late into an eclair, causing a split tone on the solo and spraying a mouthful of creme patisserie onto the flautists in front. This sentence just failed the instrumental auditions and has decided to become a conducting major. This sentence has never listened to a full work by Richard Wagner without the assistance of hallucinogenic drugs. (Like many parenthetical sentences, this sentence was plagiarized from Hugo Riemann and promptly discredited as overly-mathematical and insufficiently musical by a mob of angry Schenkerians). This sentence likes the music of Boulez and anything else requiring whips, chains, and large-curd cottage cheese. This sentence, like others in the neighborhood, thought at 19 that it had learned everything it would ever need to know, and had learned most of it from Tom Robbins. This sentence was smart and hid its parallel fifths next to the weapons of mass destruction. And this sentence is just happy to be hanging out at Renewable Music, getting read by you, and you, and the other one, yes, you, with the begonia in your lapel.


Anonymous said...

This sentence is completely bewildered by Doctor Wolf, and that's a petunia, not a bagonia, in my lapel.

Anonymous said...

And this sentence was an idea copied from Tom Robbins whom the author did at least have the generosity to tip his head to. But nicely done, anyways.